What I failedto consider is that the non macho way I conducted myself made me verysafe boyfriend material for a girl who was doubting her own self. I wishthat I would have talked with Dee Dee, the Junior High cheerleader,instead of about her in expressing my discomfort of being the objectofher public attention by saying hurtful things publicly"?"?What you really would have liked was for her to see beyond the fa?adeand still want you to be her girlfriend. Next?"?"?I would have liked to take the chance to have come out as Joanna to myGrandmother the summer I spent in the lawnmower shop with my Grandfatherin Brunswick. I'll never get the chance now since all my grandparentsdied a few years ago."?"That must be really tough to never be able to show her who you reallyare inside. What else?"?"?I wish I could have made better use of confessing being trans to my HScounselor so that I could have been helped. I know that they could doonly so much without getting my parents okay but I would have. She appreciated Terri's humor, and the way she always seemed to laugh at herself. Emma thought Terri had been hilariously straightforward about the fact that her perfect 'C' cup breasts had been a birthday present from Paul. And no matter how serious their discussions became, Terri never seemed to take herself seriously.As they got to know one another better, Terri had encouraged Emma to join her in working out two mornings a week at the local gym. She had been surprised at how good it made her feel. They also enjoyed walking while they talked and tried to take regular walks through the neighborhood together each week. But what Emma liked most about Terri was her forthright manner. You seemed to always know where you stood with her. There were no pretenses with Terri. If she said it, she meant it.Emma pulled into the driveway moments later, and noticed both cars were still in the garage. "I guess Paul hasn't left for work yet," she thought. "That's good. Maybe I won't get tied up.
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